VISITOR # 
Presently Mama Enters the Scene and Confronts Shorty...
MAMA... WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO MY SON YOU?... YOU FOWL...!
SHORTY... ME?... I'M NOT THE ONE WITH THE SPARE NIPPLE DANGLIN' OUDDA THE SIDE OF MY BEAK...!
THE BABY... [still on shorty's lap]... ma?... ma...?
MAMA... [arms wide open]... COME SON... [he jumps]... YOU DON'T WANNA SOCIALIZE WITH THE LIKES OF THIS ONE...
SHORTY... [as mama and baby walk off]... 'iffin I knew what 'at socialize word ment... [yelling out]... I'D RESENT IT...!
as shorty watches the turtles disappear he concentrates on what he'll do to the chicken who scammed him... meanwhile a visitor passes .....
EARL... [from even lower]... do you mind...?
SHORTY... [looking down]... WHAT THE...?
EARL... [looking up]... your clods are in my way...
SHORTY... [moving his feet]... WHAT THE HECK'ER YOU...?
EARL... I ain't got no time for socializin'... I'm on a quest...
SHORTY... [eyeballing]... WHAT'CHU TOTIN' ON YER BACK...?
EARL... my shell, duh...!
SHORTY... SHELL!... [to himself]... chicken's got shells... [to the snail]... YOU A CHICKEN...?
EARL... [looking up]... do I look like a chicken to you...?
SHORTY... DUNNO...
EARL... [stopping]... fyi, I'm a ' phylum mollusca '...
SHORTY... A..? A WHAT...?
all this time bill goat was grazing and taking it all in ....
BILL... HE'S A SLUG, SHORTY...
SHORTY... [to the goat]... DON'T CALL ME SHORDY...!
BILL... WHATEVER...
EARL... [looking up at the goat]... I beg your partner! I'm a snail... [to shorty]... of the class: ' gastropod '....
SHORTY... [to bill]... WHAT'D HE SAY...?
BILL... [leaning down and whispering]... a slug...
SHORTY... [to earl]... WHAT KINDA QUEST...?
EARL... I didn't say ' quest '... I said gastropod...!
SHORTY... NO! I MEAN A'FORE... [sniffing him]... WHAT KINDA QUEST...?
EARL... hey! get'cha nose outta my b'ness...!!
SHORTY... [straightening back up]... YER PURDY COCKY FOR A MIDGET...
EARL... fyi, I'm on my way home...
SHORTY... WHAT DO THIS... ' FYI ' MEAN...?
EARL... outta my way fly boy...!
SHORTY... IS 'AT WHAT FYI MEAN...?
EARL... no! that's what I mean...!
SHORTY... I JUS' WANNA ASK YA' A QUESTION...
EARL... that's what'chu been doin' ever since I met'cha...!
SHORTY... ARE YOU A CHICKEN...?
EARL... I got no time for this... [continuing on]... outta my way...!
BILL... [grazing]... I TOLE YOU KID... OLD FOGHORN'S YOUR CHICKEN...
SHORTY... [to himself]... eatin' chicken is tougher'n I thougt it'd be...
Sometime later as shorty sits on a rock, tending to his missing nipple, foghorn happens by ....
SHORTY... [to himself as the rooster comes closer]... c'mon sucker... just a 'lil closer...
FOGHORN... HOWZIT GOIN' SHORTY...?
SHORTY... [again to himself]... I'll shordy you chicken...!
FOGHORN... [he gets closer]... HAS THE ROCK... UH, I MEAN EGG HATCHED YET...?
SHORTY... [still to himself]... I heared ya' the first time mr. clucker...
FOGHORN... [almost there]... WHAS'SA MATTER, GRUB WORMS GET'CHA TONGUE...?
SHORTY... [pulling out the rock]... YOU READY FOR THIS...?
FOGHORN... [totally off guard]... WHAT...?
Just as shorty rears back, a weasel infiltrates the barn yard... alarms and heavy clucking goes off everywhere... shorty hesitates ...
SHORTY... [lowering the rock]... WHAT THE...?
BILLY... [yelling]... WEASEL ALERT!... WEASEL ALERT...!!!
HOAGY... [from the sty]... TELL HIM TO WALLOW OVER HERE...!
PORKUS... YEAH! WE COULD USE THE COMPNEE....
Mama's take their babies to safety... horses and mules whinny... bovines continue chewing their cud and watch the show.. the swine put out a welcome mat... the weasel whizzes by and abscounds with shorty ....SHORTY... [riding piggy back]... HEY, WHERE WE GOIN'...?
WEASEL... [dashing]... TO DINNER...
SHORTY... AN' I'M INVITED...?
WEASEL... [looking up]... YER THE MAIN COURSE...
SHORTY... ARE YOU A CHICKEN...?
WEASEL... [speeding up]... WHATTA YOU THINK...?
SHORTY... STICK 'EM UP...!
WEASL... LATER... AFTER DINNER...
SHORTY.. WHEN YOU SAID I WAS THE MAIN COURSE... DID'JA MEAN YOU WAS GONE EAT ME...?
WEASEL... YOU GOTTA PROBLEM WITH THAT...?
SHORTY... I ON'T KNOW... I THINK I'M ALLERGIC TO DYIN'...
WEASEL... I'LL BE QUICK... YOU WON'T FEEL A THING...
SHORTY... WHY DEN'T YOU TAKE 'AT BIG CHICKEN...?
WEASEL... [tisk!]... TOO MUCH GRISTLE...
Suddenly, shorty brings up the rock and cold cobs the weasel who immediately drops to the ground...SHORTY... [now standing over his captor]... YOU BEST FEEL LUCKY YOUR NODDA CHICKEN...
FOGHORN... [catching up, he heared that]... AH, BUT HE IS A CHICKEN...
SHORTY... [looking up]... REALLY...?
FOGHORN... TRUST ME...
SHORTY... [investigating closer]... HE ON'T LOOK LIKE YOU...
FOGHORN... HUH...?
SHORTY... YOUR A CHICKEN AN' THIS GUY ON'T LOOK AT ALL LIKE YOU...
FOGHORN... WHO TOLD YOU I WAS A CHICKEN...?
SHORTY... [recalling the goat]... 'AT GUY WITH 'AT BAG 'O MARBLES DANGLIN' TWEEN HIS LEGS...
FOGHORN... [to himself]... I'll deal with him later...
SHORTY... WHA'JA SAY...?
FOGHORN... THAT'S A GOAT... WHAT DOES A GOAT KNOW OF CHICKENS...?
SHORTY... SO YOUR TELLIN' ME... [pointing]... IS GUY'S A CHICKEN...?
FOGHORN... WOULD I LIE...?
SHORTY... [to himself]... findin' chickens ain't as easy as I thought it'd be..
FOGHORN... WHAT WAS THAT YOU SAY...?
SHORTY... [studying the conked out weasel]... LOOKS KINDA TOUGH...
FOGHORN... PLACE HIM ON A HOT SPIT AND HE'LL MELT IN YOUR MOUTH...
SHORTY... MY WHAT...?
FOGHORN... I MEAN BEAK... HE'LL MELT IN YOUR BEAK...
SHORTY... YUMMY!... [dropping the rock]... WHERE'S AT BAR B Q PIT...?
FOGHORN... DIG ONE...
SHORTY... [trying to pick his dinner up]... MIND HELPIN' ME?... [struggling]... IS GUY'S REALLY HEAVY...
FOGHORN... [straining]... UGH! MAN, YOU REALLY COLD COBBED HIM...
SHORTY... [carrying the weasel by his arms]... GOT ANY IDEAS HOW TO PREPARE HIM...?
FOGHORN... [gripping the weasel's legs and following]... POTATOES AND CARROTS WOULD BE NICE...
SHORTY... [looking up]... SAY, WHAT'S 'AT...?
FOGHORN... [looking about]... WHERE...?
SHORTY... [pointing]... 'AT THANG IN A SKY...?
The rooster looks up just as the weasel begins to stir causing shorty to lose his one-handed grip.. the weasel falls and lands head first on the rock he was cold cobbed with, he's out like a light... meanwhile, something begins to circle around the farm ....FOGHORN... [straining to see]... LOOKS LIKE A...
SHORTY... [freaking]... WHAT?... LOOKS LIKE A WHAT...?
FOGHORN... [letting go of the weasel's legs]... A UFO...!
SHORTY... A U-FOE?... WHAZZA U-FOE...?
FOGHORN... [ignoring the question]... HELP!... HELP!... PAWCAW...!!!!
SHORTY... PAWCAW!... [watching foghorn freak]... 'AT'S CHICKEN LANGUAGE...
Before foghorn can lie, uh... I mean deny the accusation, the ufo comes in for a landing...
and a mess of aliens come out ...
FIRST ALIEN... [looking up at the rooster]... TAKE US TO YOUR LEADER...
FOGHORN... [still freaking]... PAWCAW...!!!... [he freezes]...
SHORTY... [to alien]... SAY BUDDY, WHY ON'T YOU PICK ON SUMBODY YOUR OWN SIZE...?SECOND ALIEN... [looking eye to eye with shorty]... YOUR OUR SIZE...
FIRST ALIEN... [confronting shorty]... TAKE US TO YOUR LEADER...SHORTY... WHY SHOULD I...?
About this time the weasel comes to, eye ball's his escape route and takes off like a bullitt ...SHORTY... [watching the weasel lam]... DAMN!...
THIRD ALIEN... [pointing]... WAS THAT YOUR LEADER...?
SHORTY... [to the aliens]... 'AT WAS MY DINNER.. WHO'RE YOU GUYS...?
FIRST ALIEN... WE'RE FROM SHIKONIA AND WE DEMAND TO SEE YOUR LEADER...
SHORTY... CHICKONIA? YOU GUYS CHICKENS...?
SECOND ALIEN... [to first alien]... HOW DID HE KNOW...?
SHORTY... [picking up the rock he clobbered the weasel with]... I GOD'CHA LEADER RIGHT HERE...
Before shorty could rear back, one of the alien's takes the rock away from him and gives it to his captain ...
FIRST ALIEN... [to the rock]... WE CLAIM THIS PLANET IN THE NAME OF ALL SHIKINS...
As the aliens wait for a response from the rock, shorty picks up a loose fence post and gang bonks the invaders.. minutes later he tosses them all into their craft and uses it like a smoker...
presently the rooster comes out of his stupor and asks the question ....
FOGHORN... [sniffing]... WHAT'S COOKIN'...?
SHORTY... [stirring the embers]... CHICKENS...
FOGHORN... [checking to see if he was in a pot]... UH! OH!... [noticing he's not on the menu]... UH, THEY WEREN'T CHICKENS... THEY WERE ALIENS...
SHORTY... [stirring them with a stick]... YEAH! ALIEN CHICKENS...