VISITOR # 
as the cat leaves, a group of fellow rats emerge around their leader ....
HYMIE... BOSS... YOUR A HOOT, YOU KNOW 'AT...!
RONALD... [watching the cat disappear]... IT'S NOT SO DIFFICULT WHEN YOU DEAL WITH THE BRAIN DEAD...
CHEEZER... 'AT CAT THOUGHT YOU WAS IN LOVE WITH HIM...?
RONALD... [back to his pals]... HEY! HE'S A LONELY FELINE...
HYMIE... KINDA NIEVE TOO...
RONALD... WHAT I WANNA KNOW IS!... [leering]... WHO'S THE DIP WADS WHO TALKED TO THE MOUTH BREATHER...?
CHEEZER... WEREN'T ME BOSS...
HYMIE... NOBODY'D TRY TO COLLECT 'AT BOUNTY BOSS... WE KNOW THE GUY'D NEVER LIVE UP TO HIS PROMISE...
CHEEZER... [lying]... I ON'T LIKE PEANUT BU'ER NO WAY...
RONALD... [looking around]... SAY, WHERE'S BOHUNK...?
HYMIE... I THINK HE'S TAKIN' A LEAK BOSS...
CHEEZER... [producing a photo]... WANNA SEE A NUDE PICTURE OF MY SISTER BIG GUY...?
as hymie and cheezer keeps the boss busy, bohunk slips up from behind and cold cobs the head rat... he goes down hard ....
HYMIE... [checking his vitals]... WHY'JA HAV'TA HIT HIM SO HARD...?
BOHUNK... HOW ELSE YOU GONNA COLD COB SOMEBODY...?
HYMIE... [trying to revive him]... THINK FARMER JOHN'LL HONOR HIS REWARD...?
BOHUNK... HE'D BETTER...
CHEEZER... WHAT IF HE DON'T...?
BOHUNK... THEN WE'LL TACK UP A WANTED POSTER WITH HIS UGLY PUSS ON IT...
HYMIE... HEY!... [feeling his pulse]... THIS GUY AIN'T BREATHIN'...
.... while the surviving rats contemplate their reward, martha's only daughter makes a visit with hubby and their three children, maxine, delbert and 'lil mikey...
While the grown-ups sit around watching re-runs of hee haw or playing clown games, the kids head out to the back yard .....
BILLY... [sniffing]... OH CRAP!
BESS... WHAT'S YOUR PROBLEM...?
BILLY... IT'S THOSE SHIT POT KIDS...
ELSIE... THERE'S KIDS ALL OVER THIS PLACE, WHICH ONE'S YOU TALKIN' ABOUT...?
BILLY... THE HUMANS...
BESS... [double chewing her cud]... OH SHIT!
ELSIE... I VOTE WE HEAD OUT TO THE BACK FOURTY AND GRAZE A SPELL...
BESS... WAY OUT....!
BILLY... [as they leave]... HEY! WHERE YOU GOIN'...? COME BACK 'N UNLOCK THIS GATE...!
MAXCINE... [entering the back yard]... WHAT'S THAT SMELL...?
DELBERT... YOUR FINGERS...
MAXCINE... NO! IT SMELLS LIKE... I DUNNO, LIKE AN OUTHOUSE...
MIKEY... [holding his hand out at the goat]... TWICK TWEET! TWICK TWEET...!... [the goat baa's]...
MAXCINE... [to mikey]... IT'S NOT HALLOWEEN, NERD...
DELBERT... [releasing the goat]... AH, LEAVE HIM ALONE SIS... HE'S IN HIS OWN WORLD...
MAXCINE... WANNA GO PLAY MOMMIE AND DADDY...?
DELBERT... [making a face]... WITH YOU...?
MAXCINE... I'M A GIRL...
DELBERT...[to himself]... yeah, that's right... [after a pause]... OKAY...
MIKEY... [following behind a duck]... TWICK TWEET! TWICK TWEET...!
Racing each other to the far end of the barn....
... At their destination ...
MAXCINE... TAKE YOUR CLOTHES OFF...
DELBERT... WHA'FORE...?
MAXCINE... SO I CAN SEE IT...
DELBERT... SHOW ME YOURS FIRST...
MAXCINE... [stripping down to nothing]... WHATTA YOU THINK...?
DELBERT... [checking her out]... WOW...!!
MAXCINE... NOW IT'S YOUR TURN...
DELBERT... [stripping down to nothing]... WHATTA YOU THINK...?
MAXCINE... [checking him out]... tee! hee...!
DELBERT... [trying to cover himself]... HEY...!
MAXCINE... [finger reaching]... CAN I TOUCH IT...?
DELBERT... ONLY IF YOU PROMISE NOT TO BREAK IT OFF LIKE YOU DID YOURS...
MAXCINE... READY TO DO WHAT GROWN-UPS DO...
DELBERT... [turning red]... YOU MEAN...?
MAXCINE... JUST LIKE MOMMIE AND DADDY...
DELBERT... [looking around]. THERE'S NO PLACE TO LAY DOWN...
MAXCINE... NO PROBLEM... I CAN DO IT STANDING UP...
DELBERT... YOU MEAN, PEOPLE DO IT THAT WAY...?
MAXCINE... [redressing]... IF THERE'S NO PLACE TO LAY...
DELBERT... WHY YOU PUTTIN' YOUR CLOTHES BACK ON...
MAXCINE... I CAN DO IT BETTER THAT WAY...
DELBERT... THEN I'M GONNA PUT MINE BACK ON...
MAXCINE... WHATEVER...
DELBERT... [redressing]... SO, LET'S GET IT ON...!
MAXCINE... OKAY... [she pats him on the head]... NOW, GO OUT AND MAKE MOMMIE A LIVING...
DELBERT... SAY WHAT...!
MAXCINE... AND WHILE YOUR AT IT, PICK UP A LOAF OF BREAD, A TOILET BRUSH AND, OH! A LARGE BOX OF SUPER ABSORBANT MAXI-PADS...
MIKEY... [still dogging the duck]... TWICK TWEET! TWICK TWEET...!... [the duck quacks]...
MARTHA... [ringing her dinner bell]... COME 'N GIT IT...!
As the kids race to the house, somewhere out in the barn yard, a chicken hawk appears from out of nowhere, lands and begins to demand ....
SHORTY... THIS IS A STICK-UP! GIMME ALL YER AIGS...
FOGHORN... [looking down]... WHERE'D YOU COME FROM SHORT HORN...?
SHORTY... [looking around]... WHO WANTS A' KNOW...?
FOGHORN... I DO...
SHORTY... [sizing him up]... YOU A CHICKEN...?
FOGHORN... DO I LOOK LIKE A CHICKEN TO YOU...?
SHORTY... DON'T KNOW... NE'ER SAW NO CHICKEN...
FOGHORN... YOU NEVER SAW NO CHICKEN...?
SHORTY... WHADDA YOU, DEAF...?
FOGHORN... NO...
SHORTY... SO! YER MAKIN' FUN OF MY GRAMMER...?
FOGHORN... NO...
SHORTY... THEN YOU MUS' BE SOME KIND'A ECHO...
FOGHORN... A CHICKEN HAWK THAT'S NEVER SEEN A CHICKEN... WHY DO YOU WANT EGGS FOR...?
SHORTY... WELL IT AIN'T 'CAUSE I'M GAY OR NUTHIN'...
FOGHORN... I DIDN'T SAY THAT... I JUST ASKED A QUESTION...
SHORTY... IT'S A'CAUSE WHAT MY MAMA TOLE ME...
FOGHORN... WHAT DID YOUR MAMA TELL YOU SHORTY...?
SHORTY... [grabbing the rooster's chest plume]... DON'T CALL ME SHORDY...!
FOGHORN... [brushing off the hawk].. THAT WHAT YOUR MAMA TOLD YOU...?
SHORTY... WHAT...?
FOGHORN... NOT TO CALL YOU SHORTY...?
SHORTY... NO, AT'S WHAT I SEZ...
FOGHORN... I THOUGHT WE WERE TALKIN' ABOUT'CHA MAMA...
SHORTY... THEN YOU CALLED ME SHORDY AND I?... NE'ER MIND! MY MAMA TOLE ME CHICKENS COME FROM AIGS...
FOGHORN... THAT SOUNDS REASONABLE...
SHORTY... SO I'M GONE STEAL ME SOME AIGS AND HAVE ME SOME CHICKEN FUR DINNER...
FOGHORN... KNOW WHATTA ' AIG ' LOOKS LIKE...?
SHORTY... WHAT! YOU THANK I'M STOOPID 'R SUMPTHIN'...?
FOGHORN... IT WAS JUST A QUESTION...
SHORTY... OH... WELL IN 'AT CASE... NO.
FOGHORN... [picking up a rock]... HERE'S YOUR FIRST EGG SHORTY...
SHORTY... [snatching the stone]... DON'T CALL ME SHORDY...!
Meanwhile, from somewhere behind a near-by bush...
EGGAMAN... [straining to see]... WHAT'S POP DOIN' WITH 'AT ROCK, BERT...?
EGGBERT... LOOKS LIKE HE'S GIVIN' IT TO THAT UGLY KID...
EGGAMAN... ROCKS AIN'T WORTH NOTHIN'...?
EGGBERT... MABEY IT'S SOME KINDA INITIATION...
EGGAMAN... LET'S GET CLOSER...
as the two chicks draw near, shorty begins to bash the rock against a fence pole ...
FOGHORN... WHAT'CHA DOIN' NOW..?
SHORTY... I'M GONE CRACK IT OPEN AN' EAT THE CHICKEN INSIDE...
FOGHORN... THAT'S NOT HOW YOU DO IT...
SHORTY... HOW YOU KNOW...?
FOGHORN... 'CAUSE I EAT CHICKEN TOO...
SHORTY... REALLY...?
FOGHORN... [as an after thought]... at least till I get her in the mood...
SHORTY... HUH...?
FOGHORN... LOOK... YOU GOTTA BE GENTLE.. YOU GOTTA SIT ON IT TILL IT HATCHES.
SHORTY... HOW YOU DO 'AT...?
FOGHORN... IT'S EASY... JUST LAY IT DOWN ON THE GROUND AND SIT ON IT...
SHORTY... IT WERE ALREADY ON A GROUND... HOW COME IT DENT HATCH...?
FOGHORN... BECAUSE YOU WEREN'T SITTIN' ON IT...
as the two newby's get closer ...
EGGBERT... [to egga]... WHATTA YOU THANKS GOIN' ON...?
EGGAMAN... I THANK POP'S CONNIN' THE KID...
EGGBERT... LET'S HELP...
EGGAMAN... RIGHT BEHIND'JA...
the two mischief makers take off for areas unknown, meanwhile shorty gets with the program ...
SHORTY... [roosting on the rock]... LIKE ISS...?
FOGHORN... EXACTLY... BUT YOU BEST TAKE IT OVER TO THAT TREE AND SIT ON IT...
SHORTY... WHY COME...?
FOGHORN... TO GET OUTTA THE LANE OF TRAFFIC...
SHORTY... I LIKE IT RIGHT HERE JUS' FINE...
FOGHORN... [beginning to leave]... SUIT YOURSELF BUT WHEN THE FIVE O'CLOCK TRAFFIC HITS, DON'T SAY I DIDN'T WARN YOU.
SHORTY... HEY!... WHERE YA' GOIN'...?
FOGHORN... I GOT THINGS TO DO... PLACES TO SCRATCH... [a wing raises]... FOWL TO POKE...!
SHORTY... WILL I SEE YA' LATER..?FOGHORN... IF I HAVE THE ENERGY... [leaving]... HAPPY HATCHIN'...
as the rooster heads toward the coop for some well earned nookie, shorty remains perched on his rock... after awhile his back end becomes numb and he dozes off into dreamland... meanwhile bert and egga sneak up behind him and exchange the rock for a turtle egg...
EGGAMAN... [to bert as he tosses the rock]... THINK HE'LL NOTICE THE DIFFERENCE...?EGGBERT... PROB'LY NOT... HE LOOKS KINDA STOOPID.
from a nearby corral a horse and mule is taking it all in ....
As the two chicks scurry off to their next assignment, the horse turns to the mule ...
ED... DID YOU SEE ALL THAT CHES...?
CHESTER... YOU TALKIN' ABOUT THAT CHICKEN HAWK SITTIN' ON 'AT ROCK...?
ED... DIDN'T YOU SEE? THE TWO NEWBY'S DONE SWITCHED IT FOR A TURTLE EGG...
CHESTER... REALLY...? IT LOOKED LIKE AN'OER ROCK TO ME...
ED... IT WERE A ROCK... BUT THE TWO YOUNG'INS SWITCHED IT... NOW IT'S A TURTLE EGG...
CHESTER... A TURDLE EGG? LORDY BE... WONDER WHY THE 'LIL FELLER'S SIDDIN' ON A TURDLE'S EGG...?
ED... I WAS STUMPED WHEN HE SAT ON 'AT ROCK...
CHESTER... MAYBE HE'S TURDLE SIDDIN'...
ED.. TURTLE SITTIN'? WHAT DO THAT MEAN...?
CHESTER... DON'T KNOW... SOUNDED BETTER'N ROCK SIDDIN' THOUGH...
ED... WELL, BEST WE GET OUR NOSE OUDDA BARNYARD B'NESS AND DO OUR THANG.. GOT US A BACK FOURDY TO PLOW...
CHESTER... WHADDA YA' MEAN ' WE '... [following]... I DO ALL A WORK...
ED... SOMEBODY'S GODDA KEEP THE MARES IN LINE...
CHESTER... WHY CAN'T I DO THE GUARDIN' THIS TIME...?
ED... 'CAUSE YOUR DADDY DEN'T KNOW THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN A MARE AN' A JACK-ASS...
meanwhile, mother calls out to her newest arrivals ...
CHICKY... CHILDREN!! TIME TO EAT...
EGGAMAN... [to bert]... WHAT DO EAT MEAN EGGA...?
EGGBERT... DON'T KNOW... [taking off]... BUT I'M ON IT...
EGGAMAN... RIGHT BEHIND YA' 'LIL BRO...
as they surround mama ...
CHICKY... WHAT WERE YOU KIDS UP TO OUT THERE...?
EGGBERT... NUTHIN' MA...
EGGAMAN... JUS' SCRATCHIN' 'ROUND...
inside the chicken coop ....
FOGHORN... PA'CAW!...
BIDDY... [almost looses her balance]... WHAT THE HELL..?
FOGHORN... WHAT IS THIS SHIT? ONLY THREE EGGS IN THIS ENTIRE COOP? YOU GALS GONNA HAVTA DO SOME HEAVY PRODUCIN' IFFIN YOU EXPECT SOME OF THIS...
CLARA... [to biddy]... YEAH, LIKE HE'S THE ONLY ROOSTER ON THE FARM...
BIDDY... THAT'S THE PROBLEM... HE IS THE ONLY ROOSTER ON THE FARM...
CLARA... WELL I DON'T GIVE A FLYIN' FEATHER WHAT HE WANTS...
BIDDY... C'MON! A COUPLE MORE MEDIUMS WON'T HURT...
AGATHA... ANYTHING TO KEEP HIM INTERESTED...
FOGHORN... TONIGHT I GOT A SURPRISE LADIES... I'M GONNA TAKE YOU ALL ON... ONE AT A TIME...
HENRIETTA... [walking in, she heared that]... TALK ABOUT YOUR OVER-INFLATED EGO...
CLARA... HOPE HE USES THE RIGHT PECKER THIS TIME...
.... meanwhile, shorty's aig wakes him up ....
SHORTY... WHOA!... EARTHQUAKE!... EARTHQUAKE...!
SHORTY... [to nobody]... WHAT THE HELL IS... [pointing]... 'AT...?
THE BABY... [scrambling about]... ma!... ma!.... ma!... ma...!
SHORTY... MAMA?... [scrutinizing]... IS 'AT WHAT A CHICKEN LOOKS LIKE...?
THE BABY... [looking up]... ma?... ma?
SHORTY... [picking the baby up]... MAYBE I GODDA SHELL IT A'FORE I EAT IT...
BILLY... WHAT'S GOIN' ON 'ROUND HERE...?
SHORTY... C'MERE YOU...
BILLY... [grazing closer]... WHATTA YOU WANT KIDDO...?
SHORTY... [presenting the baby]... DO I GODDA SHELL THIS CRIDDER AFORE I EAT IT...?
THE BABY... ma!... ma...!
BILLY... YOUR GONNA EAT HIM...?
SHORTY... 'COURSE! I'M A CHICKEN HAWK... [pointing]... 'AT'S A CHICKEN... I'M GONNA EAT HIM...
BILLY... WHO TOLE YOU THAT WAS A CHICKEN...?
THE BABY... ma!... ma...!
SHORTY... 'AT GUY WEARIN' 'AT FUNNY CAP'N SPORTIN' THOSE SKINNY LEGS...
BILLY... ARE YOU TALKIN' ABOUT THAT GUY WHAT CARRIES HIS PECKER ON HIS FACE...?
SHORTY... WAS 'AT A PECKER...?
BILLY... OLD FOGHORN'S JERKIN' YOU SON... HE'S A CHICKEN... [pointing]... THIS HERE'S A TURTLE...
SHORTY... A TURDLE?... [looking at the baby]... CHICKEN HAWKS DON'T EAT TURDLES!... [looking up at bill]... THEY EAT CHICKENS...
THE BABY... ma...! ma...!
BILLY... WELL, YOU'D HAVE A REAL FEAST WITH FOGHORN, THAT IS IF YOU CAN GET PAST THE GRISTLES...
SHORTY... WHERE'S 'AT CHICKEN? HE'S HISTORY... [dropping the baby]... HEY CHICKEN, COME OUT HERE...!
THE BABY... [surrounding shorty]... ma!... ma...!
BILLY... NOT SO LOUD! HE'LL NEVER SHOW UP IF YOU CHALLENGE HIM...
SHORTY... [trying to push the baby away]... WHADDA I DO THEN...?
BILLY... [pointing]... SEE THAT ROCK OVER THERE...?
SHORTY... [picking up the rock]... YOU MEAN, THIS THANG...?
BILLY... [nodding]... SIT ON IT, BIDE YOUR TIME... EVENTUALLY HE'LL SHOW UP.. WHEN HE GETS CLOSE, HIT HIM OVER THE HEAD WITH THE ROCK THEN HE'LL BE ALL YOURS.
SHORTY... [checking out the rock]... SURE THIS AIN'T A AIG...?
BILLY... EGG?... WHAT TREE DID YOU FALL OUT OF...?
SHORTY... [rolling it around]... I THOUGHT THESE THANGS WERE AIGS...
BILLY... WHO TOLD YOU THAT...?
SHORTY... 'AT CHIC... [on second thought]... UH, IT DON'T MADDER!
BILLY... WELL, IT'S A ROCK... TRUST ME.
SHORTY... A ROCK, HUH?... [flapper up, two feathers separate]... 'AT'S TWO I OWE HIM.
so the chicken hawk sits on the rock and waits... meanwhile the baby seeks his mama ....THE BABY... [scampering about]... ma!... ma...!
SHORTY... [kicking at him]... GO WAY KID...
THE BABY... [looking up]... mama...?
SHORTY... I AIN'T'CHA MAMA!.... BEAT IT...!!
without warning the baby hops up on shorty's lap and takes a plug out of him ...SHORTY... HOT DAMN!... (feeling his chest)... I THINK I USED TO HAVE A NIPPLE O'ER HERE...
THE BABY... MA!... MA...!